I recently went to a conference on eating disorders and came away with a new energy and passion to talk about real beauty. The beauty that is unique to each person and comes from within, not just the beauty that media promotes.
Dove’s Real Beauty Campaign has produced some powerful videos to help us all be mindful of our “True Colors”. Please take a moment to look at 2 of my favorites.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gm1uNgHw6Xo
www.youtube.com/watch?v=bkaPs8CIipw
When talking about food, notice if you designate foods as “good” or “bad”. Do you say “you’ve been bad” if you eat something sweet?
When talking about yourself, do you ever say “I feel fat”? Even though fat is not a feeling.
Our kids are watching and listening.
When talking about food, I like to think “food is fuel”. Like with a car, if I’m going on a long trip, I’m going to need a lot of fuel (think basketball games, soccer, learning all day in school). If I’m going on a short trip (sitting around playing video games), I don’t need as much fuel.
Talk with kids about “healthy serving sizes” and “1 serving foods” (pizza, ice cream) and “2 serving foods” (fruits and vegetables).
One of the most powerful interventions for eating disorders is a confident self-image. Ask your child, “What do your friends like about you?”. If you hear, for example, “I’m a good drawer, good friend, fun to be with, fair, a fast runner”, things that are intrinsic or inside a person, you have a child with budding self-confidence.
If on the other hand, you hear, “I don’t know” or “they like my clothes, my video games/toys, that I’m pretty”, things that are extrinsic or on the outside, start working on building up the inside.
Real beauty is more than skin deep. Pass it on.
Post a comment and let me know your thoughts.
Beverly Dolenz Walsh
Life and Family Coach
Dr.Bev@sbcglobal.net
Imagine Your Life...Then Live It!
Monday, February 25, 2008
Monday, December 3, 2007
What do you want to believe about Santa?
Christmas season has begun! Christmas Spirit … Decorations … Commercialism… and… Santa questions. I was waiting for the day when my daughter, who is now 8, would ask if “Santa is real?” One of her best friends informed my daughter it’s the parents, not Santa, who brings the presents for Christmas.
So, my daughter, with her searching brown eyes, asked me straight on, “Mom, is Santa real?”
I responded, after taking a deep, searching breath…”What do you want to believe?”
That’s all that she needed to hear. She needed to hear that I was giving her permission to develop her beliefs and let them evolve.
With a smile on her face, she described that Santa is real because Saint Nicholas is real. “He must work with the parents to bring the presents,” she explained. Santa, in the spirit of Christmas and Jesus, helps children feel loved and special. She still hasn’t quite figured out the logistics about the chimney yet, especially since ours in under construction. That will be for another year :-)
What do you want to believe?
Post a comment and let me know your thoughts.
P.S. One of my favorite Christmas movies is “Elf”
Beverly Dolenz Walsh, Ph.D.
Psychologist, Life and Family Coach
Imagine Your Life...Then Live It!
dr.bev@sbcglobal.net
So, my daughter, with her searching brown eyes, asked me straight on, “Mom, is Santa real?”
I responded, after taking a deep, searching breath…”What do you want to believe?”
That’s all that she needed to hear. She needed to hear that I was giving her permission to develop her beliefs and let them evolve.
With a smile on her face, she described that Santa is real because Saint Nicholas is real. “He must work with the parents to bring the presents,” she explained. Santa, in the spirit of Christmas and Jesus, helps children feel loved and special. She still hasn’t quite figured out the logistics about the chimney yet, especially since ours in under construction. That will be for another year :-)
What do you want to believe?
Post a comment and let me know your thoughts.
P.S. One of my favorite Christmas movies is “Elf”
Beverly Dolenz Walsh, Ph.D.
Psychologist, Life and Family Coach
Imagine Your Life...Then Live It!
dr.bev@sbcglobal.net
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
Tips for Teaching to Share
Teaching Children to Share
Have you ever noticed the look on the face of a 3 year old when told to "share a toy" or "give Jimmy a turn"? I don't think a look of gratitude or understanding is what comes to mind. I think most young children equate sharing with "me having nothing" and the other child having "everything".
I noticed that if I requested that my kids "traded" toys, instead of "sharing" a toy, I got much better cooperation. This way, both kids had something.
My question to my childen as they are gearing up to grab that coveted car or toy is, "What's your trade?". At times, I may have had to referee, "find a better trade", as my older child was trying to sneak in a "loser" trade. For the most part, however, the idea makes sense to children and is received easily.
Another tip is to offer "taking turns" and then set a timer or number of tries as the trade off point. Remember that 10 minutes or 10 tries is an ETERNITY to a 3 year old. Keep the time and turns within a limit that would make sense for a young child - 5 minutes or 3 turns for example.
Before you know it, you will hear your children becoming master negotiators and sharers of all things.
Anyone else have any tips or thoughts on sharing?
Beverly Dolenz Walsh, Ph.D.
Life and Family Coach
Imagine Your Life...Then Live It!
Have you ever noticed the look on the face of a 3 year old when told to "share a toy" or "give Jimmy a turn"? I don't think a look of gratitude or understanding is what comes to mind. I think most young children equate sharing with "me having nothing" and the other child having "everything".
I noticed that if I requested that my kids "traded" toys, instead of "sharing" a toy, I got much better cooperation. This way, both kids had something.
My question to my childen as they are gearing up to grab that coveted car or toy is, "What's your trade?". At times, I may have had to referee, "find a better trade", as my older child was trying to sneak in a "loser" trade. For the most part, however, the idea makes sense to children and is received easily.
Another tip is to offer "taking turns" and then set a timer or number of tries as the trade off point. Remember that 10 minutes or 10 tries is an ETERNITY to a 3 year old. Keep the time and turns within a limit that would make sense for a young child - 5 minutes or 3 turns for example.
Before you know it, you will hear your children becoming master negotiators and sharers of all things.
Anyone else have any tips or thoughts on sharing?
Beverly Dolenz Walsh, Ph.D.
Life and Family Coach
Imagine Your Life...Then Live It!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
